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Mark Latham, Labor, and pissing your pants for a living

For all his hot air and tough-boy, blue-collar posturing, Federal Labor MP Mark Latham turns out to have a glass jaw a toddler could smash a fist through. Latham can dish it out, but he sure as hell can't take it. Latham's brusque act hides an intellectual paperweight, whose airhead bluster puts him alongside the likes of Hugh Mackay in resentful, leftie "we hate life and ourselves" gasbagging.

Today's edition of The Age printed the text of his epic crybaby speech in parliament last week. It contained an assload of priceless, hypocritical, self-righteous bilge. This is just too easy to give a Fisking.....

I grieve for the rise of the new political correctness - the hypocritical demand of the conservative establishment in this country for civility in political debate. Imagine the hide of these people - the old money interests, the conservative think tanks, the Tory MPs and their fellow travellers in the commercial media.

Strangely, Latham doesn't detail these "demands". And it's a hoot for a Labor MP to talk of media lackeys, self-interested MPs, and interests. Coz we all know the independent media types Phillip Adams and Hugh Mackay aren't Labor lackeys, that Clive Hamilton runs a completely unbiased think tank, that Duncan Kerr isn't a self-interested politician, and that the (f)arts community and trade unions aren't "special interests".

They have spent the past 20 years hopping into the unemployed, Aboriginal communities, newly arrived migrants and anyone else at the bottom of the social ladder, and now they want civility. This is the height of hypocrisy.

What a twat: I seem to recall Labor giving us double-digit unemployment when they were in office (which I guess isn't as important as saying you care about workers, even while you're destroying their jobs). They did fuck-all about Aboriginal health or the "reconciliation" process in thirteen years, yet Latham feels qualified to lecture the current government on race relations. The real corker is his mention of migrants. Because we all know Labor politicians never say anything bad about migrants, don't we?

They want civility on just one side of the political fence: the sort of civility by which George Pell is automatically declared innocent,.........

Yeah, I guess we should throw his ass in jail before he's been convicted of anything. What happened to all that labor civil-liberties and justice palaver?

........while Michael Kirby and other social reformers are slandered in the Senate.......

Well the fuckwit who slandered Kirby lost his position and had his reputation pummelled by the press and the public, so he hasn't exactly escaped scott-free. And who the fuck are these "social reformers"?

...the sort of civility whereby big business is allowed to regulate itself, while the rest of society receives a truckload of mutual obligation.....

Classic Mackay-ism. Big, emotive and quite meaningless sloganeering somewhat devoid of context or examples. Ah well. Depth of argument isn't Latham's strong suit.

......the sort of civility where the work ethic of the royal family is beyond question....

Um, what?

....while Tony Abbott can call young unemployed Australians "job snobs".

I seem to recall him talking specifically about a certain group who would refuse a job because they didn't like it. Well I hate to break it to you Cecil, but I would class these people as "job snobs". Tsk, tsk. Taking out-of-context is naughty, Mr. Latham. What was it you were saying about proper behaviour?

For the establishment, civility is a way of preserving the social pecking order. It helps the ruling class to avoid public scrutiny and accountability.

Latham and his Labor goons, with their multi-million dollar parliamentary pensions, their insular, bloated, branch-stacking party-structure and relentless championing of unaccountable bureaucratic regulation, are now whining about a ruling class. What a sick joke.

It tells working people to accept their lot in life, without challenging the power and privilege of the Tory elite.

Oh, these would be the same working people who support government policy over illegal immigration? The same ones who've voted you out of power since 1996? How dare these bastards not challenge the power structure and vote Labor!!! Don't these brainwashed scum know what's good for them???

(And does anyone else snigger at the likes of millionaire champagne leftists and red-tape enthusiasts like Latham, Keating, Hawke and Phillip Adams lecturing anybody about power and privilege?)

This is a new political correctness, where sameness is embraced and rebellion is written off as rude. The old political correctness, with its unspoken truths and protection of special interests, was bad enough; the new one is twice as bad. It threatens to turn us into a nation of robots........

You'd think these thick-as-pigshit lefty whiners would come up with a new riff occasionally. Here we go again: Federal Labor policy is deeply unpopular with voters. But rather than party-hack dickheads like Latham admit they are totally out of touch with the real world, they lament that we are all becoming mindless, brainwashed robots under the terrible, secret influence of the Nazi Liberal Party.

..........without the irreverence and daring that have always defined our national character. Bit by bit, it is chipping away at our cultural identity, eroding the great Australian traditions of larrikinism and mateship.

Classic Mackay-ism: disguise the complete irrelevance of your own sorry-ass party, and your huge unpopularity at election time with some bland waffling about us all losing our true soul. News dude: you've lost three fucking elections in a row. Do you think, just maybe, that something stinks about the way you guys are doing things?

For the Tories, civility is important for another reason: it is code for the re-election of the Howard Government. The conservative establishment is trying to turn this government into a protected species, beyond criticism and beyond condemnation.

Here's a test for you Marky: give me an example of the government being "beyond criticism" or "beyond condemnation". People with your opinions seem remarkably free to speak them anywhere they choose. You seem to be confusing censorship with people exercising their rights to call you an idiot when you say something stupid. Sorry to disappoint you pal, but this aint Singapore - we're free to criticise who we want, when we want. Grow some testicles, you loudmouth wimp.

No matter how many times the Prime Minister hugs the Americans or tugs his forelock to the royal family, the establishment will defend him and then have the hide to claim that the Howard Government is protecting Australia's national sovereignty.

Yeah, the PM defends our current constitutional system. What a bastard!! And fancy him agreeing with our most powerful and most important ally - the Americans. Has he no shame? He should be doing what our brave, visionary leader Paul Keating did: sign secret defence deals with our lovely genocidal Indonesian-Junta buddies. I guess this is the Labor idea of leadership.

And snivelling Labor windbags like you are in no position to lecture anyone about sovereignty, seeing as you plan to sign it away by signing every idiotic UN petition you can get your hands on, open our borders to people smugglers and presumably go back to your old habit of coddling Asian tyrants.

This is the defining characteristic of Tory politics: double standards, led by Abbott. He says he supports community-based politics, yet he has an obsessive hatred of Australia's largest community-based organisation, the trade union movement.

The union movement is representative of "community"? It doesn't even represent the workforce anymore.

He claims the ALP is no longer a working-class party, yet he had kittens when I used a great working-class term (arse-licker) to describe the Prime Minister's sycophancy towards the United States.

Well Mark, you practically had a seizure when somebody called you a "jerk" in parliament. You accuse Howard of "sycophancy" for supporting our most important ally, yet you are silent about the support your enlightened, progressive, brave party gave to genocidal psycho General Suharto. Where was your big, brave, dissenting-voice-of-the-people then, you slimy hypocrite?

When Pauline Hanson gave her maiden speech in parliament, heaping abuse on Asians, Aborigines and anyone else different to her, the Prime Minister said the era of political censorship had ended.

Attention all stupid people: Pauline Hanson is no longer in parliament

Now the Tories are trying to impose their own form of censorship - a new political correctness that defends the political interests of the Howard Government.

Mark Latham, you are a weak-kneed chickenshit of the first order: you can't give any examples of such "censorship". All you fucking weasels do is cry all day because evil non-Labor people have the temerity to criticise your policies. Like I said: grow some balls, Dame Edna.

There is, of course, nothing civil about the government's electoral strategy. It aims to turn Australians against each other through the politics of division. This is a replica of the culture war in the US, the type of strategy that inspired Pat Buchanan to write the following memo to Richard Nixon in the late 1960s: "We should tear the country in two and then pick up the bigger piece politically."

What this means of course - in Latham's pathetically tortured, craven parlance - is the government puts forth its policies, and a majority of people vote for them. This cannot - in the mind of the out-of-touch idiot-left - be a display of a free, democratic population. Rather, it is always the sign of decay in our society's democratic process. Seems the likes of Latham are in favour of democracy except when they lose elections.

He also doesn't seem able to explain one glaring problem with the "Howard is dividing us!!!" argument: if you Labor twats were ruling us benevolently - and we were all marching hand-in-hand to a glorious Keating-governed future - why the fuck were you dickheads utterly destroyed in the 1996 election?

<...sound of crickets...>

In fact, the progressive consensus in Australian politics is holding up remarkably well. Whether people live in the inner city or the outer suburbs, they want greater social investment in education and health. So, too, they want a more sustainable urban environment, with less congestion and pollution.

Sure. There is a progressive consensus, yet you idiots still can't win elections. I would have thought there was a message in there somewhere. How is it if we're all supporting this evil, racist government, that the "progressive consensus in Australian politics is holding up remarkably well". You can't have it both ways. Then again, logic aint your strongpoint.

If the Prime Minister is to smash the progressive consensus in this country...........

What fucking "progressive consensus"??? The coalition has won three elections in a row, you asswipe.

.........he will target questions of race and responsibility. Twelve months ago, when they came together on the Tampa, they divided the nation.

Interesting concept of social division Latham uses, considering the policies had overwhelming public support. Get over it, you loser.

The government is also engaged in a double standard. At the last election it said: "We decide who comes into this country and under what conditions." Yet in other areas of public policy it allows foreigners to call the shots.

What a fucking pathetic reprobate. Our government determines policy here. They are representatives of the Australian people, who voted for them knowing they had such policies

It allows Australia's foreign policy to be determined in Washington. When the Americans say jump, the Prime Minister asks: "How high?"

No, he agrees with their policy and wants to support them. Don't you understand the difference, you meathead?

And besides, every time some Gaddafi-loving, Saddam-apologist UN employee criticises Australia, how come you Labor weasels can't wait to say "how may lick your asshole, oh master?", "where do we sign your treaty our public doesn't want?". Or more often, "how may we abase ourselves and apologise to the offence we have caused your glorious organisation?". You chickenshit, pants-pissing bastards need to fucking grow a spine before you lecture anyone about grovelling to foreign interests, you limp, gutless fucks.

On constitutional reform, its stance is determined in London. And recently Abbott spoke of the Catholicisation of the Liberal Party. Catholicisation means that the Liberal Party's social policies are being determined in Rome. This is the ultimate hypocrisy. The government may decide who comes into the country but, increasingly, its other policies are being decided in Washington, London and Rome.

Yet you seem perfectly content to do this yourselves. You're so desperate to suck on the politically-correct rectum of the UN, you seem to forget about your lofty principles on sovereignty, or looking after the best interests of your own country. God help us if you whimpering, spineless bastards get to represent our country before the world.

By contrast, Labor is anti-establishment. We aim to help the outsiders, those disenfranchised by the Tory network of businessmen, think tanks, media lackeys and coalition MPs.

Excuse me while I barf. It's hard to believe this hare-brained rabble is the party of Ben Chifley.

As far as I am concerned, if you want civility in Canberra, buy a parrot.

What for? We've already got one from your electorate.

Drunken Intruder wins huge payout from his victim, and so does his mother!!!!

Sometimes you wonder exactly what planet most judges come from. This cockhead and his fuckslut mother were on TV tonight, with idiot-boy saying he had no responsibility whatsoever for this incident.

That guy should have killed you, you little cunt. I'm hoping he breaks into your house and bashes your fucking head into a pulp. Hopefully, afterwards he'll fall over in your house, break a fingernail, and sue your ass for personal injury. That would be true justice.