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Live Whacking Archive
click "Live Whacking" button for the latest entries

18 July 2004

Just like magic, only less interesting

Hopefully, everyone should be able to access this site now. I had some hassles with the annual domain renewal which were entirely my own fault. Let this be a lesson to all domain holders: make sure your registrar has your current contact details.

regards,
Tex
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Terror in the skies, again?

This is bloody frightening.

(courtesy of LGF)
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A duet of stuff

John Humphries has posted some good stuff recently: a bit on fossil-fuels and another on poverty and inequality. Go read.
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Attention Morgan Spurlock

I had McDonalds for lunch yesterday, so go fuck yourself.
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This is like....very shocking, or something

FORMER ATSIC deputy chairman "Sugar" Ray Robinson allegedly gambled nearly $5million - or the equivalent of more than $5300 a day - at Queensland casinos over a 30-month period.

Of course, according to many, closing down this organisation was an act of racism.
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Is this the worst show on Australian TV?

Channel Ten's The Panel might actually be worse than anything with the words Big Brother in the title.

It's a great show if.....

- You like hearing five very annoying people talking over each other very loudly for a whole hour.

- You like political discussions which are as intellectual as toilet graffiti. ("I don't like John Howard's hair. God he is such a dork. Why would anyone vote for him? He looks like my grandad and his eyes are too close together")

- You enjoy "comedians" who are utterly incapable of saying anything funny, and have a collective IQ of 15.

- You enjoy hearing Rob Sitch's foghorn-fart laugh every ten seconds, usually in response to his own jokes.

- You think Kate Langbrook isn't dumber than a box of hair.

- You think Santo Cilauro and Glen Robbins aren't even dumber than Kate Langbrook.

Go back to making fishing shows fellas.

On the other hand, don't. They cost us money.
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More indisputable proof of global warming

It's been bloody freezing in Canberra this weekend, and the surrounding regions have had snow, hail and roads covered in ice. Even Collector and Cooma had snow, fer cryinoutloud.

Still, the lovely thing about being a global warming conspiracist, is that everything is evidence of global warming. Snow during summer would be proof. Another ice age would be considered unshakeable proof.
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8 July 2004

Any opinions?

I'm starting to notice something very weird.

Over the last few months, I've actually had trouble writing my own signature on paper.

My signature takes longer to sign than most, because I've always tried to make my name legible.

However, recently I've had to concentrate extremely hard not to fuck it up, rather than being able to do it on 'autopilot' without thinking.

I'll be halfway thru either my first or last name, when one of two things will happen: A) my neat signature becomes gibberish, or worse, B) I'll misspell it.

This makes things rather awkward when you're signing for a credit card payment, and your sig doesn't look like the one on the plastic.

I haven't a bloody clue why this is happening. I haven't suffered any kind of hand or head injury, and I can still scribble meeting notes on paper same as ever. Yet I can't sign my name properly without taking it very slowly. As as if the "muscle memory" for that task has been lost, without affecting other hand-eye coordination skills.

Any of you knowledgable in this area who care to share an opinion?

Cheers,
Tex
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Really Bad Poetry alert

Richard Neville has graced us with a poem, inspired by an "intoxicating speech" from Andrew Wilkie, before a vast audience at Epping Community hall.

Now if saying your poem was inspired by Andew Wilkie isn't the worst preface to a poem in history, I will personally give Michael Moore a blowjob.

Alas, it begins....

Wilkie’s war
Howard’s end,
a Godsend!

Or else go round the bend

As if Richard wasn't already around the bend. Richard's off the entire curvilinear spectrum.

Tonight we’re here as one,
To seal the fate
of a head of state,

His head on a plate,

An end
to the politics of hate

Richard and his merry kooks will change our thoughts. There's nothing like self-confidence I guess.

And so retrieve this sunburnt land
from the hand
of corporate tools
and fossil fools
who thumb Kyoto

and get satisfaction
from endless extraction

Never to feel the exaltation
of planetary restoration

The "exaltation of planetary restoration"? Yeeeeuch. You can just imagine some hippy masturbating a fern or something.

Farewell, heartless Howard.
Tormentor of refugees,
On the high seas.

[...]

A torturer of truth,
This dark prince of social malfunction,
A walking weapon of psychic destruction

You know how John Howard goes walking through the streets, zapping our psychic brains with non-vegetarian beam-weapons, causing malfunctions everywhere he goes.

Howard couldn’t care if he’s right or wrong,
smug and secure in Bennelong
Which is where Mr Wilkie’s war comes in
To knock the seat from under him

Heh. If you say so dude. Tell ya what Richard, I'll bet you one thousand dollars that Wilkie the Wanker won't win the seat of Bennelong.

Hush! Hush! – what’s that we hear?

It’s Wild Card Wilkie creeping up from the rear
He blows his whistle into Howard’s deaf ear,
The whistle of truth, the whistle of freedom
A whistle barely heard since the days of Whitlam

The whistle of freedom not heard since Whitlam?

Bwahahahaha.

The whistle of joy,
that rouses a nation,
from khaki death march
To wild celebration

This particular whistle of joy has been out there for a year, and hasn't roused much beyond Richard's cock, which nears spurting point with this....

Dancing in the street, everyone’s singing
Birds are chirping, the fish are grinning,
Buds are blooming, our heads are spinning
The end of Howard … is a new beginning

It's stunning how the new age left never realise just how far out of touch with the rest of the population they really are. Except on election night, when the ignorant populace generally gives them a nasty shock.

Richard isn't to be deterred though, he's already predicting a new golden dawn.....

Renewable energy, sustainable growth
Shrinking clouds of toxic smoke
Revival of tolerance and civil rights
A collective urge to raise our sights

The corporate media flat on its face
Raging debates in cyberspace

The end of brass bands led by the blind
The birth of a patriotism for all human kind

A fair go future for the world as a whole
The total reinvention of a politician’s role

No, this isn't the end of it, it keeps going......

In the years ahead we’ll look back on this night
As the start of a journey to restore the light
The time we climbed from a moral black hole
The moment this nation reclaimed its soul

Viva La Revolution! Richard and the small group of hygene-challenged dorks at Wilkie's speech are taking over!

A tale oft told … in music and song
The triumph of the Greens … in Bennelong

Yeah right. Like I said before dickhead, a thousand dollars says this won't happen.

Who wouldn't love to see Richard's reaction if Howard manages to win the election?
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Intellectual criticism of Israel

From serial idiot Paul Abeles, in the aus.politics newsgroup...

The US invaded Iraq on the excuse to rid it of WMD's.

Is it permissible for France or Russia or China to invade Israel to rid it
of WMD's?.

I really cant see any difference.

Many Jews in Israel want to get rid of Sharon, he is being called a Judenrat
by them.

Sharon and Saddam, Shias, Kurds,................Palestinians.

I see remarkable similarities.

Yes, lots of similarities.
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Helen Caldicott's love of humanity

Via Aaron comes this fine piece on the tyrant-loving leftist hag.

Caldicott made it clear where here sympathies lay when she stated:

"Free enterprise really means rich people get richer. And they have the freedom to exploit and psychologically rape their fellow human beings in the process . . . . Capitalism is destroying the earth. Cuba is a wonderful country. What Castro's done is superb."

Vive democracy — Castro style, complete with a Latin Gulag, torture chambers and firing squads.

Charming lady.

And if you think that quote is a stunner, be sure to read the rest.
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Movies (through the eyes of dickheads)

Well, I haven't talked about these bozos in a while.....

If you ever needed proof of what boring, humourless, miserable cunts socialists are, check out the film reviews sections of the World Socialist Website.

As a case in point, have a gander at the review of sci-fi flick Minority Report, and witness the endless, whiny, turgid prose...

There are absurdities in Minority Report which reveal a great deal about the social assumptions and prejudices of its creators. The American society of half a century from now is presented as generally prosperous and content, insofar as one is able to determine, but crime and murder (and drug use) persist. Why? Is there no connection between poverty and violent behavior, or, more generally, between social reality and crime? The filmmakers are either adapting to themselves to the right-wing argument that crime is essentially causeless (rooted in Man’s fallen state) or, probably more to the point, indicating their lack of interest in its causes and a concern merely with the means of avoiding its consequences.

[...]

What is one to say? How could a film produced with such a degree of collaboration between filmmakers and giant transnational corporations possibly be expected to provide a clear-sighted view of contemporary life? At a time, no less, when the pervasive criminality of the corporate boardroom, its looting of the American economy of trillions of dollars, has been exposed.

[...]

The views of Spielberg and his associates on crime, the police and democratic rights are conditioned by their social circumstances and connections. The garden variety Hollywood liberal, rich and complacent, would prefer, all things considered and if it did not prove too much of an inconvenience (or threaten his stock portfolio or career prospects), to live in a world where universal brotherhood reigned supreme. He does not view “democracy,” however, in association with the right of the broad mass of the population to decent living standards and to be defended against the coercive power of the capitalist state. In fact, he never thinks of such a thing at all, as contemporary films make clear. On the contrary, under conditions of growing social inequality, the population at large is seen in a generally hostile manner, as a potential threat to his wealth and privileges.

All this directs today’s studio filmmaker irresistibly toward the figure of the policeman, both because he is the defender of private property (and thus deeply fascinating on the conscious and unconscious levels to the wealthy) and because he can be made to represent, falsely, “blue-collar” America.

Minority Report provides us with a policeman’s-eye view, filtered through layers of Hollywood liberal cotton-wadding, of the issue of the police-state.

In that sense, the filmmakers’ decision in the end to come down against “pre-crime,” while not unimportant, hardly stands out as a compelling defense of basic democratic rights. One only has to read the ignorant and wrongheaded comments of co-screenwriter Scott Frank: “People can be against capital punishment until they lose a loved one. We can be completely civilized until the murder rate goes way up and we need to figure out how to bring in the troops. That’s how dictatorships get started; it’s always for the greater good.”

..and on and on and on it bloody goes...

Ugh. You can just imagine getting stuck in an elevator with this lot.
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6 July 2004

Quote of the day

Up yours, Zoidberg! Up wherever your species crams things!

- Hermes Conrad, Futurama
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Unfit for office

Alan Anderson gives a fine beating to the blubbering Labor leader....

Poor Mark Latham. All those big, nasty Liberals picking on him. It's very sad. And now poor Mark's having a cry on national TV about these "personal" attacks on him. Think of poor Mark's family. Think of the children.

Yeah, the children. Like Tony Abbott's illegitimate child - you know, the one that Latham enjoys taunting him about. Or Janet Albrechtsen's children, whose mother was labelled a "skanky ho" by Latham in the nation's parliament on the grounds that "she'd die in a ditch for the Liberal Party".

And how sad it is to see the tough guy who ridiculed Peter Costello for getting beaten up by a Marxist at university now reduced to public tears by a few rumours and taunts.

Indeed.

The thought of this mentally unstable arseclown as our PM is frightening. A few years ago, Latham seemed one of the few Labor MPs with any grasp on reality. Time and increasing exposure has shown him to be a loudmouth crybaby, gutless hypocrite, economic buffoon, geopolitical imbecile, and possessed of the emotional fortitude of a ten-year-old.

Latham likes to think of himself as "new politics", promoting standards up public debate he himself has shown no interest in adhering to.

He makes a great show of "putting Australia first", which seems to consist of pissing off our most important ally in the name of 'national interest', while at the same time flushing Australia's sovereignty down the toilet by ratifying the Kyoto protocol, and putting Australians under the jurisdiction of the International Criminal Court. Not to mention Labor's obsession with our international "reputation", which as far as I can tell involves basing Australian policy around criticisms from foreign governments and unelected international NGO's.

His response to the government's appalling budget spending spree is to spend even more money, everywhere, and still somehow keep the budget in surplus.

Worse still, the silly git can't seem to hold a consistent policy position from one week to the next. He's gonna pull the troops out of Iraq...except for the ones who'll be staying. He's gonna not ratify the US free trade agreement, except he will. He'll never sell out the PBS, except he decided to.....

I have no love for the current government: high-taxing, high-spending, socially intrusive statist goons. Yet I can see no policy area where a Latham government won't be infinitely worse. Particularly where it counts most: national security. Federal Labor, lest we forget, seemed keen to grovel to Islamic psychopaths the last time they were in office.

Latham is unfit to be prime minister now or at any time in the future. Let's keep this headcase and his howler-monkeys out of office for another term. Please.
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Flying pig moment

Niall Cook and I are in complete agreement about something:

So, Elvis Aaron Presley recorded a song that someone else wrote and a third person though sounded good enough to spin some cash from. Big fuckin' deal! I've never thought much of Presley, in fact I've always considered his music, his style and the hype surrounding him to be vastly over-rated. Other artists of his time and afterwards were much more pleasant to listen to, artistic, creative and innovative with music and the rock genre`. I seriously doubt Presley can be credited with actually creating anything other than a mild sensation among older generations. That's certainly nothing new through the ages, as parents have always considered the artistic tastes of their off-spring to be somewhat lacking. To each their own though. If you like Elvis, good luck to you, but please, enough of the rave and the swoon, eh? He's dead y'know and times have changed, so let's remember him with a little perspective.

Amen. Fuck Elvis. Tuneless fat bastard.

And fuck Frank Sinatra too while we're at it. Talentless old cunt.
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Monbiot takes on 4x4s

Loony commie jellybrain George "air travel is evil" Monbiot wants to abolish four-wheel drives, which are "wrecking its cities and cooking the planet".

This comes as no great surprise of course, but I decided to link to this article so you could see a prize piece of tree-hugging moral relativism at work......

the woman in the Transport Department's press office used precisely the same words as the man from the Society of Motor Manufacturers and Traders: "It is up to people to drive whatever car they choose." Taxing or banning 4x4s, she told me, would restrict people's "freedom of choice". The same argument, of course, could be made about the laws preventing citizens from carrying rocket-propelled grenades to work.

Green theology. It's a thing of wonder.
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Non-essential viewing

James Russell didn't seem to enjoy the new French movie Anatomy of Hell.
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Tamada breaks through

Japanese hotshot Makoto Tamada has won the Rio MotoGP race.

Apart from being a brilliant race, it was I think a great deal more historically significant than most people realise.

Japanese riders do not have a great history on the world scene. Being trained on the Japanese racing scene as robots for the manufacturers, they lack setup skills, and often fall apart in the hard-as-nails racing environment outside Japan.

Tady Okada looked set to break through in the 500s once Doohan retired, though he fell apart once Mick wasn't around to set up the bike for him. Noriuki Haga was hailed as the next saviour, but watched his career evaporate once he left the Yamaha superbike team.

Daijiro Katoh looked the best bet to break the mould after dominating the 250cc championship, but never seemed at ease with the MotoGP bikes, and was tragically killed at the start of last season.

Which brings us to Tamada. Yes, he has a fast Honda. But he is also the sole Honda rider using the new Bridgestone tyres, which limits the value of setup data from the other Hondas. Unlike previous Japanese riders, who have found themselves shipwrecked when forced to set up and develop their own machines, Tamada has been slowly getting to grips with both tyre and bike. There is none of Norick Abe's "charge-and-crash" attitude.

Makoto has also shown a fiery competitive spirit in racing that does not rely on dangerous kamikaze tactics. While his extreme body-lean angles are great to watch, his riding style is very smooth and consistent. He seems as comfortable on foreign circuits as Japanese ones.

Most notably, he has made a much better transition from Superbikes to GPs than World Superbike champ Colin Edwards. Both men raced Honda's v-twin superbike, Edwards in World Supers, Tamada in the All-Japan championship. Edwards has seemed all at sea so far this season, yet Tamada has just won his first race.

Tamada has the right attitude to win on the world scene, and he certainly has the skills.

I'd venture to say that if the development of the Honda and the Bridgestone tyres continues at a decent rate, then Tamada may just be good enough to give even Rossi a real shake.

Now that would be something.
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4 July 2004

What the.....?

Either this is a parody, or SteveH really needs to start lining his hat with tinfoil:

In the past, I have mentioned the fact that many, if not most, abortion supporters base their position in the hope that convenience abortion will prevent black Americans from increasing their numbers.

Idiots argue with me about it, but that's emotion talking. It's almost tautologically true. Anyone who has ever heard white people discuss politics frankly in the absence of black people is aware that many Caucasians are scared by the high black birth rate, as if we're going to end up with a Mugabe-type situation where black mobs come and kill your family and squat in your condo. The notion that that fear is not linked to support for abortion rights is facially absurd.

Turns out I'm not the only one who is willing to admit the truth.

Right. All us pro-choicers want to wipe out the darkies. This guy needs to see a psychiatrist.
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Sharapova!

Maria!

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Roberts!

Rising to the whole 4th-of-July thing, Kenny Roberts Jr. has put his crappy Suzuki on Pole Position for tonight's Brazillian MotoGP race. It's his first time at the head of the field since his championship-winning year in 2000.

Personally, I think Roberts is a crybaby twat, so I'm hoping Hayden or Tamada wins it.

Should be an interesting race.
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Joe Vialls' latest opus

Does Crazy Joe ever sleep?

Apparently, the fellow currently on trial in Iraq isn't really Saddam. It's all a big, sloppy Mossad hoax:

Allowing Shaddam to open his mouth at all in court was a serious error of judgement, because like fingerprints used by law enforcement agencies, teeth and dental work are absolutely unique, in this case proving one-hundred-percent that Shaddam never was and never could be President Hussein.

The rest of the essay is a screeching anti-semitic rant, which closes with his now standard plea for money:

Life is never easy for a former combat veteran living on a miniscule disabity pension, but mine has been made a great deal harder by sustained Internet denial of service attacks, defamation and in some cases complete bans by Yahoo, PayPal, 2Checkout.com, Rense, Rumor Mill and others. Such attacks and bans cause me to switch or add servers, change email addresses, and laboriously update or replace old reports. All such ploys are designed to slow me down severely, and deliberately reduce my ability to analyze and report media disinformation in a timely manner.

Funny thing is, noone I've asked in Aus or overseas has had any problem accessing Joe's essays. Guess the line between martyrdom and paranoia is a small one.
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1 July 2004

G'Day

I'm back.
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Quote of the day

Why should we give a rat's ass what NATO likes or doesn't like? Without the United States, the whole of NATO can't fight off the common cold.

- Kim Du Toit
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Roundup of various things

- Why doesn't Canada just join the EU and get it over with?

- Mark "flipper" Latham seems to be doing daily policy reversals. Yeah, I really want this meathead hypocrite schitzo wussbag to be PM, don't you?

- My good mate Steve is doing lots of posting over at Sasha's site.

- I'm wondering how many bloggers who do fancy Photoshop'd pictures actually own a legal copy of Photoshop?

- For anyone reading this who's into motorbikes: send me an e-mail with your opinions on any motorcycle you have ridden in the last 2-3 years. Feel free to tell me about any you'd like to ride.
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Glenn Reynolds spotted fleeing in terror from Niall Cook wannabe

Some lefty Canadian dweeb is promising to bring Instapundit to his knees....

I just finished reading through Instarube's posts for today and as usual they were nothing more than the same assortment of insipid crap that has become his stock in trade. As I was about to write a post of my own highlighting some of the dumbassery rampant in his writings it occurred to me that we should have a Fisk Instapundit Day. This could be a monthly occurrence and would involve all lefty/anti-war blahggers devoting the entire day on their sites responding to Glenn's vacuous twaddle. Then we could all ignore him until the next Fisk Instapundit Day came around.

I nominate the 10th of every month become Fisk Instapundit Day.

Does this sound like a good idea or not?

Given that dork-boy's comments box currently shows zero responses, what're the odds Instapundit would even notice?
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Oh, screw the fat fuckers already....

So sayeth Yobbo.

the government chooses to fund fat slobs to the tune of $100 million, because they are too stupid to eat less food.

Read the rest.
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Joy!

It's the first day of the new financial year in Australia today. Yay!

Another year of stupidly high taxes. Yay!

Another year of loony government spending. Yay!

If Labor gets elected, we'll get lots more of both. Yay!

I get to do my tax return now. Yay!
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Kneel before my bad breath, puny Americans!!

Alternative media "researcher" Joe Vialls has discovered that "Saddam's Liberation of Iraq Has Begun".

In the secret underworld beneath Baghdad and Mosul, Republican Guard
counter-insurgency units prepare micro nukes and binary Sarin weapons

Heh. That wily old fox. He had us all fooled with that get-conquered-and-captured-by-the-Americans act.

Yes, yes, it's clear Joe Vialls is a deranged old cunt who is up to his eyebrows in chemical refreshment. Still, he's good for entertainment value.

If you've not yet had the pleasure, here are links to some of this other...uh..."research breakthroughs"......

- Princess Diana was murdered by the Mossad using a "Pulsed-Strobe LTL Weapon"

- Ariel Sharon controls America using subliminal TV messages

- Russia is about to nuke Israel, and then drive the USA out of the Middle East

...and there's lots more...
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